Feb 6, 2012

Naked at the Golf Course - A Naughty Fad Hits the Fairways

Remember planking?

About a year ago it was quite the fad.  For several months you couldn't go anywhere on the internet without running into the image of someone's rigid body, face down arms with arms their sides, in an incongruous location.  The craze was completely global, and for a while people were planking everywhere, from the Pyramids of Egypt to the floor of the NY public library. The more dexterous among them could be found perilously positioned in overhead luggage bins, on top of towering billboards and high in the branches of trees.  Golf courses presented creative plankers with numerous options, as well. 

However like most internet memes, planking's popularity was short lived, and after spawning some interesting off-shoots, ( teapotting - owling - Tebowing) it's settled into internet oblivion where it will languish while other fads step up to enjoy their fifteen minutes. So along comes... Dogging.

In fact, dogging's been around for quite a while, but it now seems poised to reach planking-like levels of popularity.  With dogging, the supposedly staid and solicitous Brits have taken things to a naughty new level, and they've got one golf course doing some emergency reputation management.

Dogging... in a nutshell... is a variation on planking that incorporates sex, nudity and some very social networking.  Also included are elements of swinging and voyeurism... all in the great outdoors.  As with planking, the object is to produce a photograph... or video... that will ultimately be posted to the internet.  But an effective "dogging post" must illustrate a sexual situation, either with nudity or with something a bit more graphic blatantly pornographic. Unlike planking no particular body position is required, though, not surprisingly, some degree of rigidity is often featured in dogging posts.

Once practiced almost exclusively in cars at rural parks, or on isolated lover's lanes, dogging has transcended those cloistered confines and is now taking place in public parks, suburban parking lots, on village lanes... and on golf courses.  Till now, most of the "golf dogging" was done on anonymous fairways or in ubiquitous pot bunkers, but last week Lincoln Golf Center in Thorpe-on-the-Hill, found itself in a rather embrassing position when a curvaceous female dogger boldly flaunted her assets in front of their facility's sign... and then posted photographic proof on her "dogging profile page".  Not to be outdone, several of her fellow doggers made a beeline for the golf center and posted similar shots. Now the family-friendly course is scrambling to "clean things up".  Hopefully legitimate patrons will understand the situation and continue to patronize the center.  Meanwhile, with evidence that dogging is finding its way to the US,  course owners here may want to stay alert to avoid their own dodgy dogging dilemmas.

By the way, in case you're wondering how this fad came to be known as dogging (I certainly was), it seems "walking the dog" was often used with unsuspecting spouses as pretext for clandestine encounters that resulted in cyber-exhibitionism.  As the practice became more popular it came to be known as dogging... and the rest, as they say, is history.


  1. I would presume the players all know how to score, whether it's by stroke or playing for skins. As long a pair don't take overlong looking for balls in the rough, what's the concern?

    Wait, are they playing winter rules?

  2. Those cheeky Brits... in more ways than one. ;)

  3. "golf dogging" - there is a need "clean things up".. ugh

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  5. Bin there, done that, was awesome! :)

  6. Very funny post! I always thought the British were very rigid. Now I know where and why.

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